June 28, 2022

How Autobio Cartoonists Socialize

A four-panel black and white comic. In the first panel, HX and Claire are hanging out outside at night drinking a 0% beer and a glass of Rotkäppchen, respectively. Claire says "The last hangover I had was after I drank 33cl of this." HX says "Haha, Rotkäppchen is the mind-killer." In the second panel, Claire responds with "Rotkäppchen is the little-death" and HX laughs. Claire continues: "Rotkäppchen will pass through me, and I will remain." HX laughs some more. In the third panel, HX says "That's going in a comic." Claire points at them and says "DO it. And if you don't do it in a month, I'll do it." In the fourth panel, Claire says "And if you DO do it, I'll make a comic about THIS exchange" and HX laughs some more. A caption at the bottom says "How autobio cartoonists socialize."

I did the comic first lol (my friend HX is rad, check out their stuff!)

May 31, 2022

Tuesday Fanart: My Chemical Romance, "The Foundations of Decay"

A black and white illustration with lyrics from My Chemical Romance's "The Foundations of Decay". It shows Claire wearing a plaid shirt, chin length messy hair and black Chucks, standing with her back to us and staring out onto a dark pool of water filled with ruins. Text in the top left says "You must fix your heart" and in the bottom right says "and build an altar where it swells".

 🎶 Let it flood, let it flood, let it wash away 🎶

 

Before this song came out I was familiar with a grand total of three MCR songs, a number which has exponentially increased since then. My neighbors are thrilled.

(I pulled these lyrics from Genius.com, they may or may not be accurate.) Now that the song has been extensively toured and transcribed, I've updated the lyrics accordingly!

[ My Chemical Romance - The Foundations of Decay ]

May 24, 2022

Vessel

 

A two-page comic in black and white, captioned throughout with lines from a poem. On the first page, the first panel shows an empty hallway in a small apartment, with windows on the left, a door in the back, and a few doors and a mirror on the right. Text above says "I have learned not to trust that anything will last." The second panel shows Sondra and Lex standing in the hallway and getting ready to leave. Sondra, a short woman with long black curly hair, is wearing a nice black cardigan and a black skirt and holding a purse, and is chatting animatedly while Lex, a taller woman with short red hair, is pulling on a vest and smiling. Caption says "Not the good, not the bad." In the third panel, Lex leans over and kisses Sondra on the cheek; Sondra is delighted. Text says "learned to not get attached". The fourth panel shows Lex and Sondra standing outside, downtown, at night, near a subway, while a few people are walking by. They are both checking something on Lex' phone. Text says "I've learned not to believe those who leave will come back." The fifth panel shows them sitting on a subway next to a person with curly hair and glasses reading a newspaper; Lex is cuddling Sondra, who has her head on her shoulder and is smiling with her eyes closed, while Lex is resting her chin on her head and staring off at something off-panel. Text says "And I've heard otherwise, but those lies never track."
On the second page, the first panel shows the sign at the entrance to an outdoor cinema at night, with a movie reel projector and a deer head painted onto it. String lights are hanging off both sides of the sign. Text says "But deep inside your eyes," The text follows into panel 2, where we see Sondra and Lex standing in a line with other people, including a person with a plaid shirt and long black hair, a couple of men smiling at each other (one with short curly hair and the other bald), a woman with an undercut and curly hair and glasses sitting in a wheelchair, a woman with long black hair standing behind her and chatting with a taller woman with broad shoulders and black curly hair, and a small child with curly hair standing in front of them. Sondra is checking her phone and Lex is looking up at the lights. Text says "something turns on the light". In the third panel, Sondra and Lex are saying hi to friends of theirs they've run into: a tall woman with long blonde hair and a striped sweater; a shorter person with glasses and curly hair, holding a drink; and a small blond man with stubble and a plaid shirt. Text says "And it feels like I'm worthy, like I'll be alright". In the fourth panel, Lex and Sondra are holding hands while making their way over to an amphitheater style seating to sit down. Various people are sitting there already. Sondra is pointing to an empty spot. The fifth panel is a close-up of Lex and Sondra's handholding while sitting down. Text says "I have learned that my heart's in a shell made of glass". The final panel shows the amphitheater from behind, with everyone including Lex and Sondra and a couple of men (one wearing a cowboy hat, one wearing a plaid shirt) sitting down to watch the movie on a large screen pitched on the grass in front of a fence, with a handful of stars visible. The screen shows five wavy lines, almost like a rainbow. Text says "And - I know now - it's safe for that vessel to crack."

Lex and Sondra return! I drew this for Comic Invasion Berlin's Queer Movie Night, featuring a queer comics exhibit and a screening of the documentary No Straight Lines.
 
Thanks to everyone who came by and made this a very special evening — and also to everyone at the main festival who stopped by my table, asked me what I was fangirling, bought zines and generally made my first IRL Comic Invasion since 2019 a resounding success! Special thanks go to Ash and Henna aka HX for being such awesome tabling buddies.
 
My new zines collecting autobio comics from 2016 to 2022 are now all available for purchase in my store!
 

April 12, 2022

Monsters

 

A black-and-white comic in four panels. First panel: Claire is sitting on the couch, playing a video game and saying "FINALLY killed all those monsters, onwards we go... tum te dum tum..." Second panel: Claire raises an eyebrow and says "what..." while dust appears to rise from the screen. Third panel: Claire stares with an increasingly concerned look at the TV, from which more dust is rising, and says "... oh no. Oh no no no no no" Fourth panel: A text bubble coming from the screen says "Surprise! All the monsters you killed are back and everything is still a nightmare." Claire grips the controller and yells angrily at the screen: "Dammit, I play this game to ESCAPE"

Resurrect this, Blood Moon.

***

Ami·es basé·es à l'étranger et ailleurs, je ne vais pas pondre un long argumentaire dessus — le 24 avril on reste pas chez nous et on va voter Macron contre la fasciste. Si vous avez des difficultés pour voter sur place à l'étranger, n'hésitez pas à me contacter.


[ Placebo - Happy Birthday in the Sky ]

 

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March 29, 2022

Investment

 

A black and white comic in three panels. First panel: Claire sitting on a couch next to a small plush dinosaur, typing into a laptop on her lap. Caption says "Paying for in-store pickup: 10€". Second panel: Claire standing in front of a regional train stopped at the station, under a sign that says "BER Terminal 1-2". Caption says: "Round-trip ticket to Brandenburg: 3,60€" Third panel: Claire is happily hugging a giant IKEA plush shark and a little heart is showing next to their head. The shark is saying "too tight, too tight". Caption says "Having a giant shark to hug: priceless".
 

At the time I purchased this Blåhaj there were 6 left in stock for all of Berlin + suburbs. IKEA Schönefeld: far away but worth it.

 

A montage of two photos. The first one shows a road sign next to the highway in rural Brandenburg at sunset. The second one shows an empty set of S-Bahn seats and the reflection in the window at night shows Claire with the shark, taking a selfie.

[ Foo Fighters - All My Life ]

 

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March 22, 2022

Behold


First panel: Claire walking through the woods at night in winter and looking up, with text at the top thats says "I could tell you about all the hours I spent wandering around in the dark" Second panel: view from behind of Claire sitting on a wooden bench in front of a lake at night. Text on the top left and bottom right says "but those are for me to behold," "not you."

Thus concludes this particular series of nature walks! I have enjoyed them.

[ Thrice - The Artist in the Ambulance ]

 

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March 1, 2022

Boxes

First panel: Claire is walking through the woods in the winter at night, frowning, their hands in the pockets of their hoodie, staring at the ground. Text in the top left corner says:"I've thought a lot about the things I wanted to say to you, now that it's likely I won't see you again. / Second panel: Claire stands at the top of a hill and stares down to the road, where there is a stop sign. Text in the road says: "I really liked you." / Third panel: Claire is sliding down a path on the hill towards the road, steadying themself with their arms stretched out. Text in the top left and bottom right corner says: "I rarely say it. But I think you could guess."
First panel: a wide angle view of a desert, with mountains in the distance. Claire stands by the road at the bus stop while a bus arrives, now in a white T-shirt wearing the hoodie around her waist. The bus looks like the ones that circulate on Seattle public transit. Text in the top left says: "The few times my unspoken prayer was answered, it never turned out the way I wanted it to." Second panel: Claire, puts on a KN95 mask and climbs into the bus. Third panel: sitting by the window with their mask on, Claire stares out the window at the desert, curious. Fourth panel: another wide-angle view of the desert, from above. The bus is taking off into the distance, towards more mountains, these ones covered in pine trees.
First panel: a close-up of Claire staring off to the other side now and frowning, with pine trees visible outside the window to their right. Text in a box says "I used to want to say I was sorry." Second panel: we see the bus from the front, coming up the road in the dark woods. Text in a box above the bus and on the road in front of the bus says "Sorry for wanting you" and "Sorry for wasting your time". Third panel: view from far above as the bus winds up the pine-tree-covered mountain. Text in a box on the bottom right says: "Sorry for not fitting into the boxes that I thought would make me whole".
First panel: Another view of the bus from the front arrives onto flat ground. The woods are completely dark. Second panel: the bus is now parked on the left side of the panel next to the trees, with a couple passengers standing around outside. Claire, on the right side of the panel, is walking away into the woods, wearing their hoodie again and holding their mask in their hand. A text box between Claire and the bus says: "But I don't want to try to fit into those boxes anymore." Third panel: Claire is walking through the woods at night, clutching her right arm with her left hand, looking up with an anxious, frowning, questioning expression on her face. Fourth panel: we see Claire from behind as she has arrived at the edge of the woods and is now looking out onto a beach, with the sun rising in the distance.
In a series of three panels, Claire looks back behind her towards the woods with her arms folded across her chest and frowning, then back out towards the beach with wider and curious eyes, and then looks at the beach some more in the other direction with a knowing smile on her face, raising one eyebrow. In a series of two panels, we see Claire from the waist down with her hands in her pockets as she stands at the top of a staircase, then as she takes a step forward. In the final panel, we see a wide angle shot of the beach that Claire is now standing on, with a staircase to the left leading back up to the woods on the top of the hill, a large mountain in the background, and a small boat tethered to a wooden walkway to the right of the panel. Claire has their hands in their pockets still and is staring down the beach. Text in the sky says: "I don't want to say I'm sorry anymore". Text on the bottom of the page says "July 2020 - November 2021".






This comic has been bouncing around in my brain for the last couple of years! Now it is here. Hope you like it.

 [ Thrice - The Color of The Sky ]

***

If you're looking for places to donate to help in Ukraine, Libereco is a Swiss-German NGO that has created a joint humanitarian fund with their local partner organisation Vostok SOS. They also have a list of ways that you can help, including directly where you live. Even things that can feel small are essential.

Other organizations doing work on the ground that you can donate to are:

  • Respond Crisis Translation (link is to a mutual aid fund to support translation and interpretation for refugees in Afghanistan, Haiti and Ukraine)
  • Each One Teach One (a community-based organization in Berlin working to promote the interests of Black, African and Afro-diasporic people in Germany and  Europe, currently coordinating accommodation and relief for BIPOC fleeing Ukraine)
  • LSVD Berlin-Brandenburg MILES program (offering psychosocial & legal support for LGBTIQ* refugees in Berlin and Brandenburg)
  • moabit hilft (coordinating and distributing material donations)

In general, please also mind what you are reading, what you are sharing, what you are putting on people's feeds, and verify where it is coming from. In times like these it is easy to act impulsively, and this can be used for harm; if you are in a safe place, allow yourself to take a step back to ask yourself what is helpful to those who are not.

 

October 22, 2021

Fanart Friday: Sad Comics 2021

Earlier this year a series of bad things and personal upheavals happened. I drew various short comics to process some of them and will be updating this post with them for the next few weeks on Fridays.

Content warning: some of these touch on stuff like death, grief, depression and religious trauma, so please be mindful if that is something you aren't up to reading right now.


A two-panel comic in black and white. In the first panel, Claire is sitting on a bench by a lake at night, looking out onto the water. The edge of the lake is paved and there is a street lantern and a tree. Claire is wearing shoulder length hair and a plaid hoodie. In the top left corner of the panel are the lyrics to a song in French that mean "I don't have much to say to you". In the second panel we see Claire sitting on the bench with their arms crossed, staring off to her left and frowning. Behind her are trees and next to her is a trash can. In the bottom left corner there are lyrics from the same song, translating to "and not much to make you laugh." The song is "J'ai demandé à la lune" by Indochine.


Translation: "I don't have a lot to say to you, and not a lot to make you laugh."